My confidential White House informant, The Really Honorable I.M. Totus, has provided this advance copy of the non-partisan Memorial Day address
which he is programming President Obama to deliver.
Some far right-wingers may be shocked at what President Obama plans to say and may even consider it a bit over the top. However, it is wonderful to learn that he intends to meet his own personal goal of explaining things precisely as he sees them rather than hiding behind disgarded notions of political correctness and reverence for the past. Honesty is no longer merely the “best policy.” Now it is obviously his own personal policy as well.
My fellow Americans, I stand before you on this historic occasion to remind you that the values for which our brave troops — as well as brave folks everywhere — fought and occasionally died also had an even more important purpose…
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